Sunday, May 18, 2008

It All Fits in Eternity

Sometimes we create things because all we want to do is understand, and remain ... sane. We have to think of things to fit in between the pieces of memories that we all try so hard to hide from. It's like we can not believe that we are capable of bad things unprovoked. It doesn't fit into our minds where "my, myself, and I" remains the only good person left. If we recognized our own depravity than what would we do with ourselves? We can not even recognize that of the world. How did we become to numb to things? Are we fed too many statistics? Why do 20,000 children suddenly mean nothing? It could just be another way we protect ourselves. Brains were not built to comprehend 20,000 souls, especially not when we have thus far failed to comprehend our own eternity. Sometimes it's like being chained to a wall while watching someone choke to death. We want so much to help, but we can't. So, what do we do? We weep. Then, after this has happened 20,000 times we just stand there and use useless sanity protecting phrases like "that's just life" and "I'm only one person." I often times wonder how God does it. We are bound by our own humanity. However, God it bound by free will. Time and time again millions and millions of people are choking, but nothing seems to happen. God tries without crossing into the lines of free will. We watch and cry while chained to the wall by our own humanity. Then I realized that we do not understand our own eternity. What if we all hold the ability to get out of those chains? What if we ignore the eternity we all hold inside out of human fear? Not even humanity, but something as controllable as fear. Or can we control it? The few people who shook the world to create a change for all those with no voices. They controlled fear. What if people did that 5 at a time? 10? or 20? What kind of world would we live in? We might just stop making excuses for our own depravity. We might stop crying about the depravity of others. We might stop labeling the world because we are tired of being disappointed with the lack of change. We might actually do something. God does not give free will to chains. He gave it for freedom.


Jennifer said...

Catie, I just wanted you to know how much I love reading everything you write. they are like the highlights of my week.

I love the way you think about things and how you try to actually think things through...and I don't think you're scary...and you don't hold grudges. I love you

Average Terran said...

This is amazing! How do you do this? I think I didn't truly understand how fantastic you were as a poet!