She May be Living

She was chronically ill
The entire time that she lived
She was dying slowly
So slowly that no one bothered
Noticing

Her pale complexion perfectly masked
Her slowly fading color
Life leaving her face
One painful day at a time

In the end she found only
An increasing desire to surrender
Everything

Dying was the final surrender
The destination
That one only takes in a blind faith
Believing that what is left on the other side
Is somehow
Better

It was exhausting
Her life was draining
From everything
Dragging the life out of everyone
Only to get vengeance
On the pain she was feeling

And when she died
Took her last breath
And surrendered to the light
I felt...
Relief
As if a burden had been rolled off of my shoulder
The Pilgrim's Progress
Was ending

It was the birth
Of me

She was resenting

I am made complete

My denial of her
Nearly my undoing
Forgetting that somewhere
Somehow her ghost wanders
Setting herself free
When no one is paying attention
To the creeks in the hall

And then...
I saw her walking
Walking around taking as she pleased
She was so real
So life like
That for a moment I found myself wondering

Was her death
Her ultimate deceit